A new beginning
by Disciplineequalsfreedom
Summary: What if Rey took bens hand, believing that maybe they could make something new, they could be the balance of the force, a balance of dark and light. She knew they could, and he knew they could. They only had to prove it to each other.
1. Chapter 1

Breathing in she closed her eyes and willed herself to make a choice, no matter what choice she made she would lose something. It was just a matter of deciding what she would be willing to lose. If she lost Kylo she'd remain as she was, fighting for her new home, the resistance, Finn, Poe, Leia, but what would she be fighting against Ben, could she do that. Fight him, accept the only thing remaining in him was darkness and leave him, to doom himself to misery. But staying meant she'd be turning her back on the only family she had ever had. Just imagining the faces of her loved ones, staring at her, looking at her as she chose the darkness. She wonders about Luke, he had said she went straight to the darkness, that she hadn't even fought it, maybe this was her destiny. To go to the darkness, but the thought of leaving the light made her sick. Made her angry to abandon something she had just started, no matter what the choice was, one would save her and she was sure the other would kill her.

Opening her eyes she met his pleading ones, pleading her to stay, the darkness surrounding his brown orbs showing all the emotions she knew he couldn't say. Pleading her to save him. But what did saving him mean, saving him from the darkness bringing him to the light. Or did he want to be saved from the light and remain In the darkness. He wanted her to let go of the past, of the things holding her back, but that made her who she was, and his past made him. Light and dark blending together, she felt a faint buzzing around them, as if everything else had ceased to exist and without thinking. Without realizing it, she felt her hand grab his, she felt his warmth and relief envelop her. And she stepped closer to him looking up at him and leaning her face towards his. Unsure of what she was doing, unsure of what she was feeling, just letting her connection to him dictate her actions.

Next thing she knew she had crashed into him and felt the entire floor shift beneath her and she realized something was wrong as she felt him stiffen next to her.

"We have to go", she sensed the tension In his voice,

But before she could respond she heard steps approaching them, and quickly realized that although she felt it was just them, she had overlooked and hadn't considered how their actions would be perceived. Snokes body laid next to them lifeless and she looked at ren frantically asking for answers with her eyes hoping he would have an answer, a way to fix what was happening. She felt her breathing speed up, her heart began to race, and she felt herself about to panic.

But before she could an overwhelming sense of calmness washed over and as she turned to look at him he outstretched his arms. And before she could ask, her consciousness begin to slip and as she felt herself fall she felt his arms lift her and the last thing she heard was him faintly saying he was sorry.

/

"WHAT IS THE MEANING OF THIS" Hux yelled at Kylo as he saw the body of his supreme leader lay on the ground life less and Kylo the thing he most despised on this planet standing there, the girl layimg limp in his Arms. Slowly Ren laid her body down, carefully almost as if he was trying to not harm her.

"The meaning of this is that I am supreme leader you imbecile!" He said walking towards him, towering over him.

"You will not be a leader of Any kind!" Yelled Hux attempting to sound threatening but the shaking of his voice giving him away.

Glaring at him he began to force choke him lifting him enough for his boots to dangle over the floor.

"I said I am your supreme leader! And you will answer to me! And the girl will remain unharmed! Do you understand?" He asked tightening his grip on the mans neck, pleased as he saw the redness seep into the mans face as he weakly nodded.

Throwing him to the side he swiftly picked Rey up, carefully placing her close to his body as he quickly ran to his command shuttle knowing they had to get out of there.

Once he had reached it he gently laid her down and fastened her, looking at her he felt as he was seeing her for the first time. Her skim tan from living in Jakku for so long. Her lashes thick framing her eyes. Her skin covered in light barely noticeable freckles. Her cheeks lightly flushed, her hair framing her face, her lips soft and pink. He had never seen a face, so serene relaxed yet strong and guarded. Shaking his head to focus he moved urgently.

Sitting in the pilot seat he quickly launched disregarding the chaos happening at their surroundings and they left, his main focus being to get them to safety, somewhere quite and calm that would give them the chance to think, to plan and figure things out.

Leaning his head into his hands he sighed. Angry at himself, angry at snoke. Anger, that anger Kylo ren was so known to have. He fought it, for the first time since he could Remember he kept the anger at bay. He had to control himself, get Rey to safety. Rey, she was nothing, or well she was supposed to be nothing, a scavenger a single person, yet somehow she was something else something he couldn't even describe.

What had he done, everything for a girl, a girl he didn't know, emotions he couldn't describe and a bond he now wasn't sure would even remain.

He had done so much for the darkness giving up so many things. Killed Solo, his own father, watched there as they attempted to kill his mother, and taken so many lives. And it could all have been for nothing, years of sacrifice for nothing. How foolish of him, how stupid. Yet he couldn't even bring himself to feel regret, only a sense of calm and hope at having her so close. He couldn't even bring himself to worry over all the unknowns yet to come.

He flew the ship to a nearby first order base, landing swiftly. He opened the hatch and walked out first, he was sure word of his uprise as supreme leader had gotten around. As he exited he was faced with dozens of troopers, looking down, bowing to him and he couldn't help but feel a sense of joy as he felt the power he finally deserved was his.

"Prepare my quarters and bring in an additional bed! Now!" He yelled and as soon as the words left his lips he saw everyone moving to follow his command.

Walking back towards his ship, he entered to find Rey, picking her up he placed her over his shoulder, still surprised at how light she felt, it felt almost as if he had nothing on him.

He slowly walked to his quarters, ignoring the stares he got from all around, all the questions they were wondering would have to wait for later, they would have to wait until he at least had some answers for himself.

By the time he had reached his room, the accommodations had been made and everyone had left. He entered, closing the door behind him and placing Rey down on his bed, brushing her hair away from her face he stood up walking to the other bed and next thing he knew he was asleep, unaware he was even tired.

/

He awoke to a slap to his face.

"Where the hell am I!"


	2. Chapter 2

Hey guys, quick note just wanted to let you all know that updates will be be happening once a day for the first 15 chapters at least. Thanks to Everyone who followed and favorited, would really appreciate reviews in order to have some feedback and see what things you guys want in the story!

Enjoy!

"Where the hell am I !" I screamed, slamming my fist into his chest standing up glaring at him.

"You're in my quarters, I brought us here so we could discuss, everything occurred so quickly, I assumed you'd want to talk and discuss our situation and plan our next steps." He said in the most obnoxious calm voice, as if he was just stating the obvious, as if I was supposed to be okay with him just knocking me out and placing me wherever he decided would be of the most convenience to him.

"And what in the world made you think I wanted to be brought to your quarters! I don't remember asking you to! Because the only damn thing I remember is you knocking me out!"

"I had to, Hux was nearing us and I knew you wouldn't be able to handle answering questions!"

Hux, Snoke are dead. But Finn, Luke… oh god what did I do, they're dead, they have to be dead. I'm gonna be sick.

"I have to go back! My friends! I have to save my friends!" I started screaming as Kylo decided now was the time to force freeze me so I would be unable to move.

"Would you relax, and give me a moment to speak, I will find out what happened to those people you call friends, and I'll make sure to inform them of the choice you made so they can decide to end this futile fight and spare themselves the misery of having to be killed."

"No! You can't tell them, they won't understand, you don't understand they'll think I'm abandoning them, they'll think I turned to the dark side! They believe in me Ren!"

"Believe in you, what do they have to believe in! You made your choice Rey, you chose this, to help me bring order, to bring us into a new era, an era of rule and order to the galaxy! An order the republic couldn't bring, or the empire, nor the first order! Let them think what they want, soon they'll be bowing at our feet!"

Bow? I don't want anyone to bow to me, I don't want to be a ruler, I just want peace for everyone.

"Ren please, please don't do this, let me tell them, I can say it in the way they won't blame me or hate me. I don't want anyone to bow at my feet, I don't want to rule alike a supreme leader. I just the fighting the war to stop. Please!"

"Don't you understand, we have to let go of the past, of the resistance, the first order, the only way to do that is to let it burn. Let everything burn, let them burn! And let the universe see the power we will have, and the peace we will bring after I finish my path. And I know you don't understand me! At least right now, you can't see the bigger picture, your blinded by a fake reality, a reality you think could exist but it can't, not with our plan at least."

"What are you doing."

I felt him pulling at my consciousness trying to disable me again, but this time it's different, I'm angry, and it's at him. Breathing I push him out of my mind, attempting to make him release his holds on me.

"You're strong with the force, but untrained, unaware of how to control your power, like a child attempting to play with a toy they know nothing about. I'll teach you soon, I promise. I'll help you learn, you'll be powerful and the galaxy will bow before you."

And the last thing I felt was my legs slip beneath me.

Angrily Kylo stormed out of the room.

He found two storm troopers and yelled, "The girl is not to leave the room! She isn't allowed to even step foot outside! If I so hear she does, your lives will be mine! Do you understand me!" He screamed his hand leaning towards his saber, proving the validity of his threat.

Stomping his was through the halls he made his way to the communications room. Aligning his cape he stood in front of the screen preparing for his next step.

"Hello resistance, general. I am glad to inform you all, that I have taken over the mantle of supreme leader. And Unlike Snoke I plan on finishing what was started, I will bring order to the galaxy, beginning by killing all of you. Any of you, who so dare stand in my way will be slaughtered by my wrath. To answer the question I'm certain you're all pondering over your precious Rey is fine, in fact she's by my side now. She made the right choice, in joining us. And as a gratitude towards her, I offer you all the same choice, surrender yourself and you will be given a place amongst the first order, a home in which you will witness the ending of the resistance."

Walking away he ripped the cape off his shoulders tossing it towards the ground, he no longer needed useless antics to prove himself. His own power would be enough to cause fear in those surrounding him.

He slowly halted, taking time in order to reflect on these recent actions, over everything he'd done. Wondering if he had made tube right choices. And as he felt his mind drifting somewhere, the place he always tried to avoid. And before he could stop it, There it was again, that pull to the light. He felt it constantly, and every time he did he remember the feeling of his fathers hand grazing his face as if he was forgiving him for his action and showing he still loved him. It was stupid really, that even in death Han Solo let love dictate his life.

Love, an emotion so unknown to him yet one that he pondered over constantly.

How could a person place a single life over an entire mission, a destiny. It was foolish and stupid.

Yet he wondered, he killed snoke, the man he abandoned his entire family for rather than killings Rey, a simple scavenger.

Shaking his head he banished those thoughts from his head, he couldn't ponder on them. He had to ignore the tugging he felt, the warmth in his chest as he envisioned Rey. Remembering her he began to think.

Rey, she's bound to wake up at any moment . She'll be furious the moment she wakes up.

"You will open this door and leave it unguarded" Rey said calmly trying to break the bond she felt Kylo had placed upon the guards.

"We have direct orders from supreme leader to not allow you to leave the premises" they said in unison. Angered Rey began screaming, cursing the guards very existence until she saw the door open and ran to it.

She crashed into a hard chest falling to the floor with a hard thud.

"That language Rey, wouldn't expect a Jedi, a student of Skywalker the least was allowed to say such things?" Ren said raising an eyebrow at her.

"I don't have time for your idiocies Ren, explain. Now! I don't have time to waste and so dare you try to pull another stunt, I'll use your own saber to end you right now. I am done with your theatrics. Talk to me, person to person, and explain everything, because quite frankly everything you say contradicts and I have no idea who you are or what we're doing." She said standing up, staring him down to show that she was over the situation.

"Sit down and we can talk"

She sat uncomfortably, never having sat on something quite as plush as the bed of the supreme leader or whatever it was that Ren now called himself.

"I announced my ascendence to your little resistance, or well what's left of them, I also took the courtesy of announcing your decision to join me on this new found quest" Ren spoke, announcing his voice pacing with his hands crossed behind his back, even though he was only speaking to her, he still attempted to make it seem as though he was trying to demonstrate his position. Before he could continue, Rey interrupted him.

"Two things, have you never spoken to another being before, do you really have to announce your self as if you were talking to some grand jury. And secondly who the hell are you to speak for me!" reys voice began getting louder as she continued her anger flowing her through words.

"Before you get all rash and angry, I also was gracious enough to allow them an opportunity to surrender and I would spare there lives." Ren spoke the words as if what he had done had been a huge sacrifice.

"Can we scratch everything for a moment right now and talk about what's really going on. You killed Snoke, and the last thing I remember is you promising some grand thing about bringing order, but without the first order. Forgetting the past and all that mumbo jumbo. Now I will be willing to do that, leave everything. But you have to promise somethings. No killing just to kill, and not a single person of the Resistance will be slaughtered, or captured or tortured or any thing that the first order used to do. And I will not be controlled, you will not own me nor have the power to simply incapacitate me for your convenience."

Kylo watched her speak and couldn't help but notice everything, the wrinkle between her eyebrows, the way her eyes spoke more than she did and he couldn't help but feel something stir inside him. A feeling unknown, a waste of time he couldn't dwell on. Shaking his head he focused on what she was saying.

"You want conditions, fine I'll give you conditions. I'll spare their worthless lives. But they have to back down, well stop the killing but we will do what we have to bring order, even if some lives have to be lost. And you aren't allowed to speak to them, any of Them actually. You have to leave it all. Forget it and forget them."

"I'm sorry do you own me! I thought we were meant to bring order! Together! As partners, but the way your saying it, you expect me to just follow what you want! Im sorry but you don't own me and I'm not yours to decide who I can and can't speak to!" Her voice grew impatient and angry as she realized she may have made a mistake in her choice.

Mine, that actually doesn't sound half bad, it would offer an excuse as to why we joined forces. What else to bring people together than a good old fashioned love story, it doesn't have to be true actually, just believable.

"That's a good Idea, you know what, you are mine or we'll have everyone believe you are. You're going to go say goodbye to your friends. Give them an explanation and if you want this to work. If you want me to spare them, I will but you have to do this. You'll go to them, and make sure they believe you. Tell them we fell in love, that the bond Snoke created grew past our own beliefs and that we decided that nothing mattered and you gave everything up, to be with me"

Rey just stared at him, shocked. The way he said everything, so matter of fact as if it wasn't sick. Completely sick to lie to an entire galaxy, an make idiots of themselves.

"I'm sorry what, you can't expect me to that."

"You want them to live, than you'll do exactly as I say!"

Next thing she knew she was sitting in Ren's shop, flying towards the Resistances base. About to commit what might be they biggest mistake of her life


	3. Chapter 3

**Hey guys chapter three here, small twist happening here but don't worry it won't last for long. Thank you to every one supporting the story I appreciate it so much, keep the reviews coming I love the feedback.**

 **Enjoy!**

"You've got to be kidding me Ren, even if I really do this tell them all the lies. They know me, and they know that I wouldn't do something like this."

"Well then, if you want them to live I suggest you make your self very believable. Or do their lives not matter that much to you, because if that's the case. I'll just kill them all myself."

" I don't have time to worry over your threats, I'm doing what you want, but what you want is unrealistic"

Groaning, she shut off communications having grown tired of hearing his stupid stupid voice.

How could a single person get under her skin so much, and why on earth was she listening.

She was an idiot, she was such an idiot, here she was listening to him. She had to keep ignoring it, she kept ignoring the feeling she got whenever she thought of him.

How had she ended up in such a mess. Hating To admit it she almost missed her life as a scavenger.

 _Stupid Kylo, stupid plan, stupid lies. God what did I do. I could have left. I should have left. Killed Kylo myself, would have saved myself a lot of Trouble._

Shaking her head she continued Following the beacon Leia had given pondered over what she would say, what she would do. How In the world would she make them believe her.

How could She, the most socially awkward being in this galaxy make others believe she had somehow fallen in love with Kylo Ren. He was evil, or well he was supposed be. She didn't even know who he was, he saved her life killed for her. And in his own insane way, he was trying to help her, protect her or some thing. She was insane, Rey was completely insane, listening to him. The more she thought she realized something she could get there and ignore all his stupid ideas abandon this plan. Tell them the truth, they could keep her safe, and then they'd take out the first order, they could win this war. She realized though that doing that could also kill all of them.

So no matter what she did she could be risking everyone's lives. Everything was her fault, but no she had to go and find Ben and risk everything for his stupid stupid life.

Although following Ren at least gave her some guarantee that they would be safe, so she really had no choice.

/

"General, we have a ship approaching wishing to send a communication" Poe spoke to the general.

"Patch them through"

"Hello Leia! It's me Rey, I need to talk to you, all of you actually, and it would be much easier if I could do it in person."

"See I told you all, Kylo's crazy he made all that stuff up! I knew Rey wouldn't leave us" Finn spoke with so much Enthusiasm and relief to see that his friend was back and safe more than anything.

"Quite! Finn, Rey you are granted permission to land. I shall be waiting here to speak with you."

Quickly Rey landed and opened the hatch. And walked outside, amazed at the sight before her.

"Finn!" Rey yelled with joy, running towards her friend, the last time she saw him he was unconscious, on the verge of death.

She crashed into him, wrapping her arms around him as he did to her as well.

"God you had me worried, I almost believed the lies that jackass had said" he said walking with her, towards the general.

"About that Finn, they weren't completely lies. Well the way he said it isn't entirely the truth, I just, you need to hear me out"

Before Finn could speak General Leia spoke, "Rey, come we have much to discuss."

Quickly everyone gathered as general Leia stood next to Rey.

"Is it true? Did Kylo kill snoke?" The general asked.

"Yes he did, he killed him in order to save my life."

"Your life? Why would he care for you?" Finn asked.

"Snoke, he created a bond between us, a force connection, while I was with Luke, there would be moments where Kylo would appear and I could see him, touch him and he could see me and touch me. And I felt him, his inner battle, his struggle with light and dark. So I left, I went to him feeling I could save him, I thought I could turn him. And I got there and long story short Snoke tested him, he had to kill me to complete his training. He couldn't though, he uhmm killed Snoke In order to save me."

As Rey spoke it seemed everyone had grown tense, unsure of what to believe. On one hand the story Rey was telling was true in one form or another, all she had done was tweaked it a tiny bit.

"Cut to the chase Rey, did you or did you not join him." Finn spoke, his voice growing annoyed.

 _God what am I doing, what do I do, god Ren would know what to do, Ren he knows._

Closing her eyes, she focused on everything she felt, love, hate, anger and focused on one thing.

Kylo Ren

Opening her eyes she saw him, he was standing in his quarters his back to her.

 _Look at me. Help me. What do I do._

Almost as if he had heard her thought, he quickly turned. His eyes meeting hers, he saw the fear in them realizing where she was.

"Rey, I assume your with them right now?" He asked, questioning her, she lightly nodded almost unnoticeably

"what don't know what to do, or are you backing out." He asked almost ridiculing her or teasing it seemed.

 _Help me, I don't know wish to say, or how to say it. How do I get them to believe me._

"Repeat what I say, word for word."

Fixing her posture, she stared at them, the faces of those she loved as she prepared to break their hearts.

"It's not that I joined him, its more so that we joined each other. The force bond showed us something, it showed us each other. And it was something neither of us had ever imagined. And we saw something, a future with both of us. We were leaders, leading the galaxy ruling with peace and dignity and everything was in order. There was no resistance, no first order, no resistance just peace. And that's why I'm here, I need you all to believe in me, and trust in me. Im giving you guys an opportunity a chance to be a part of this, of the new future." Rey spoke almost in unison with Ren, feeling her stomache turn as she felt sick at the words she was saying. She tried to show love in her eyes, joy, trying to make them believe in her.

"Your lying. You wouldn't do something like this, you wouldn't choose this, not of your own will. He's making you do this, he's forcing you." Finns' voice grew angry refusing to belief the words that Rey was speaking.

"Finn, I don't have to prove anything to you. I know what I want, and I want this, for me for Ren, for all of us. I did what I had to, I came and I gave you a chance. And now I have to leave" Rey's voice began shaking as she grew weary of her decisions.

Kylo's voice grew dark as he spoke, "Rey you have to get out of there. You have to leave now."

"I can't let you do this Rey, I can't I'm sorry."

And before Rey could do anything, Finn had taken Leia's stun gun and placed it against her chest.

"Finn don't do this, you don't want to do this"

Kylo watched her, he could see the imprint of something against her chest, what where they doing all he could hear was her words.

"What are they doing Rey! TELL ME!"

"I'm doing this for your own well being, you don't see it now, but you will okay you saved me once it's my turn now" Finns voice sounded different, it scared her.

The last thing Kylo saw as the connection fading was Rey falling towards the ground, except this time he wasn't there to catch her.

/

It must have been hours later when Rey woke up, she was in a cell, they had decorated it tried to hide the fact it was a cell.

"Where am I!" She screamed standing up wrapping her hands around the bars.

"I'm sorry, I hate doing this really, it won't be for long, we Just need to talk to you some more. Clear things up and see what's really happening. I didn't want this, but everyone insisted. Your place is amongst us, your a Jedi." General Leia spoke, her eyes showing the distaste she had for the situation they were in. Before Rey could respond Leia walked away.

Closing her eyes, she leaned her head against the bars, realizing that she just kept making mistakes.

 _What am I doing. Why did I do this, I haven't been able to fix a single thing. I just make them worse._

 _Ren, he'd know what to do. Why do I care._

 _Why am I even thinking of him._

 _This is all his fault anyways, had I never gone to save him I would have been fine. Everything would be fine._

 _Regret, I should be feeling regret, for all of this, but I don't._

 _How am I okay, being here stuck in a cell as long as it's for him._

 _I don't even know who I am anymore._

"Really didn't take you as the type to just sit there and ponder, I was expecting more of a fight from you"

"Kylo, what are you doing here, or well not here here. This connection likes Happening at the most inconvenient time"

"Where are you. Tell me and I'll come get you,"

"I don't know, they just want to talk to me some more, figure out if I'm lying."

"And they plan on doing that with you in a cell"

" I don't know Ren, I don't know what I'm gonna do or they are, I just need time to figure it out"

"A week. If you aren't Back within a week. I'll have to kill all of them. Do you understand?"

Before Rey could respond she felt the bond fade.

 _A week, great let's see how I manage to fix this one._


	4. Chapter 4

**_Long time no post right? sorry about that, life sometimes happens and it swing you round in a circle without giving you the chance to grab hold of yourself._**

 ** _anyways enjoy this new chapter, hopefully you enjoy it! Let me know what you guys think_**

 _A week, great now I'm supposed to work some god damn miracle and create some epic love story out of fucking no where in less that 7 days to save the lives of the people i love, who just so happen to have stuck me in this position in the first place. Just what i need right, like my life isn't hard enough like i don't have my own crap to fix._

She could go about this one of two ways, change her mind and back out say the truth and hope that through some kind go miracle the resistance could somehow fight back. Or she could lie, whats another lie right, it wouldn't matter in the long run, she could fix this or well she had a better chance at fixing this if she just swallowed her own emotions and played her cards right.

Somehow, she had to make a story of falling for ben, a story showing some sort of redemption or somehow something. Frankly she didn't know, the closest thing she had to love quite honestly had been to Finn, a brother in a way. and that would be the problem, there wasn't a lie in the world she could say that he would even consider to be true.

She had to find a way though, it would be the only way, if not everyones death would be on her. There was a chance to fix this, and she would be damned if she didn't take it.

The sound of steps approaching snapped her out of her thoughts as she quickly raised her head to see who was approaching.

"Are you ready to talk to me, I'm sorry for what I did, really I am. But you have to understand, you saved me from my own stupidity once. Its only fair I repay you the favor you know."

"I'm not being stupid, you idiot. And i already told you when you first tried talking to me, that the only person I want to speak with is Leia. She's the only one with the capacity to understand the decision I made and the only one who I know will let me out of this fucking cell. I wanted to talk to all of you and i wanted to do it the right way the first time. Now, frankly I'm pissed and I dont feel like looking at you and seeing your stupid face"

It hurt her to sound so angry to Finn, but it was the only choice she had, either she pushed him away enough for him to not care and if he didn't care he wouldn't pay enough attention to pick up the lies she knew she would soon be making.

"This isn't you Rey, you know it and I know it. I don't know what sick freak did to you in order for you to believe in his lies but we'll fix you"

"I DON'T NEED TO BE FIXED! COULD YOU UNDERSTAND THAT PLEASE I DONT NEED TO BE FIXED!"

"Rey please, talk to me, what did he do? I'll understand. I've seen firsthand the things he does. The monster he so easily becomes, I've seen him kill, I've seen him torture. I understand what you're going through. I was brainwashed and controlled by the first order to you know. I can help you but only if you talk to me. And together we'll fix this, end the first order, and you can finish what you started. You can avenge Solo, you can be the one to kill him when the time comes"

Listening to his words drag on she felt anger rising within her and she couldn't control it or understand it. He was wrong, he had no idea what he was saying. how could he think she would do that. She wasn't, no she wouldn't hurt him. Ren saved her, she would never be the one to take his life. She would never allow anyone else to either. Finn kept going, dragging on and on about the evils of Kylo Ren and how the galaxy would be such a better place once he was finally killed.

Before Rey could even realize what was happening, her hand shot out in front of her and she stood as Finn gasped for air and his body slammed towards the wall.

It was an out of body experience for Rey, unaware of how the words were leaving her mouth and no control over the things she did.

"SHUT UP! YOU'RE NOT TOUCHING HIM! SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!" She felt herself scream, anger and hatred dripping from her voice.

It should be terrifying to her, feeling this darkness inside her. This cold spreading in her, she should be terrified.

But she wasn't, it was exhilarating in a sense, it made her feel alive.

/

"SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!"

Rens head shot up from his seat where he was as heard her voice.

Anger, he had never heard that much emotion coming from her before.

His eyes, found her standing in his chambers it appeared but he was aware she wasn't really there, but he saw her hand in a position his had been in countless times.

The frown on her face, the way her eyebrows framed her angered eyes. The slight trembling of her body, all of it giving away the fact she was most definitely force choking somebody.

She was magnificent to him.

But he couldn't let her do this the only point of her being there was for her to fix things, convince them to let her go so she could return. If she killed anyone that was most certainly not gonna happen, they'd keep her as a prisoner.

He focused all his energy on her, focusing on her he felt the anger she felt coursing through his veins. Usually he would revel in such a feeling but surprisingly he felt hurt and sadness as he felt the immense amount of anger such a seemingly kind person could hold.

Staring at her, he channeled calmness and forced himself to feel the most relaxed he'd ever been knowing that if he focused on her she'd feel it too. After a couple seconds he saw her blinking rapidly as her hand quickly dropped and came over her mouth, covering the sounds of the gasps she began to take, her body beginning to shake with her sobs.

"FINN! No no no, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I got mad and i dont know what happened. I'm sorry, please open your eyes please Finn, please!" she cried falling to her knees, unaware of his presence or the fact that he'd even witnessed what had just transgressed.

"Rey, I need you to look at me and tell me whats happening, I cannot help you if I don't know what is happening. I need you to get up and I need you to get it together." His voice was cold and distant, but he knew that was how it had to be if he had any hope to help her control herself in this situation.

She turned around to face him, her eyes brimming with tears, for face showing how terrified she was.

"I… I… He just, he started saying how I was lying, and how you… That you…" She could barely speak over her sobs.

He walked closer to her, his eyes staring into hers, willing her to calm down.

"He called you evil, and a murderer and he kept saying how I would be the one to kill you, that I had to avenge Han, but i just. I lost it, I don't know how it happened. I got so angry and then he was there choking and I just."

Her voice broke as a new wave of sobs over took her.

"I'm a monster, I could feel the darkness in me as I did it, I could feel the cold and I… I loved it, I've never felt more alive in my life. God! I'm sick, Disgusting"

How dare she, speak of her self in such a manner. How could she regard herself as being as evil and disgusting as he was, she wasn't, she didn't have a guilty conscious how he did. Everything she had done, had been done for survival. It had been done in order to save herself, never out of pride or conquest like he did.

"Look at me, Rey I need you to look at me. This is going to be excruciatingly hard, its going to hurt and you may lose all you're loved ones and they may never speak to you again. But would you rather them choose to not speak to you, or have that choice made for them when they are killed. It's your choice, channel your anger and hatred and turn it into drive and passion and get yourself the hell out of there, or I'm going to be forced to go get you myself and believe me, me and you would be only ones leaving their with our lives."

Her eyes flashed to him, the pain and fear she had in them quickly replaced by anger.

"This is your fault! I almost killed him because of you! You put me in this stupid situation! This was you're stupid idea! This is all your damn fault you idiot! I hate you!"

"You can't spend you're time hating me, remember Rey, you're supposing to be convincing them of how we fell in love right? Remember all is fair in love and war, and this is your chance to make the next move or they'll all be dead."

/

 _Who the hell does this idiot think he is, using me like this. Basically making my decisions for me, I should kill him, I could kill him, If i could almost kill the closest thing to family I had. Killing him would be easy, it'd be a weight off my shoulders._

Screaming Rey ran towards Kylo, determined to slam her fist into her face. But the moment she stepped towards him, he was gone. He had never really been there, her anger had made her forget how he was only their because of this stupid connection. This stupid connection that put her into all these problems anyway.

Turning around she ran back towards the railing of the cell, where finn lay on the ground. If it weren't the even rise and fall of his chest Rey would be certain he was dead.

She sat on the floor, placing her head on her knees as she tried to think about how in the world she was going to get herself out of this mess.

Her thoughts were interrupted by someones voice.

"Would you like to explain what happened here?" Leia voice somehow was always full of serenity and wisdom, something Rey clearly knew she lacked.

"If I tell you, would you believe me?"

"You have only one way of finding out don't you?"

Sighing Rey knew she was right, she had to say the truth, or well at least part of it because Finn would say his version soon enough.

"He threatened Ren, and I lost it…" she mumbled, her voice low enough she wasn't even sure Leia heard her.

"You love him? Or you're at least trying to make it seem like you do, aren't you?"

Rey's eyes shot up to meet Leia's eyes, she looked tired, exhausted almost.

"I'm not gonna try to convince anyone, either they believe me or they don't, I know my truth"

"You're being vague in your responses, technically not lying, but you aren't being honest with yourself or anyone else either. Did he force you to do this, believe me, if anyone knows hoe forceful and persuasive my son can be, its me…" her voice trailed off as if she was reflecting on memories and moments she shared with Kylo.

"He gave me a chance, he saved my life and in exchange he gave me a chance, an opportunity to be safe and change things. To fix things, to fix the first order. To find some sort of balance in this mess. And I came her to say that, to just say that so you could make your own decisions and so everyone could understand I didn't just turn my back on this, on all of you. Leia I can fix this, I can do this, I just need a chance and I can't do that while stuck in this cell." She pleaded with Leia, she knew she hadn't really tied in a love story but maybe Leia would imagine she would read between the lines and imply to herself that somewhere in there they had somehow fallen in love.

Because Rey couldn't, she could force those words out of her mouth, well she hadn't really tried too but she was sure that if she did she wouldn't be able to.

"How did this happen anyways? From what I was aware you're interactions with my son were limited, vague even."

And with that Rey gave in, telling Leia everything, the connection Snoke supposedly made, Kylo murdering Snoke to save her and somehow she snuck in pieces tiny little lies that built up a story. A story of how she and Kylo connected, how they found a balance and how somehow they got to know each other and how it became something more. She only hoped that the more she told Leia the more confidence Leia would gain in her story and how her love as a mother would blind her from the lies with the hope that her son could be saved. Rey didn't bother to notice that the little lies she was making weren't very far off from the truth, she couldn't notice or else she'd be in even more trouble than she was worth.

/

Kylo had somehow fallen asleep, as he contemplated wether or not he should actually give Rey the week he had promised. Was keeping his word worth the risk shed change her mind, come up a with new plan without him. A plan against him…

He was awoken though by Hux calling him through the door.

"Your ship has returned supreme leader,rest assured the girl returned safely was unharmed. The prisoner she brought with her will be placed in your chamber for interrogation"

 _Prisoner? That wasn't part of the plan, who did she bring. Could it be Leia, no she wouldn't do that. He hadn't seen his mother directly in years. No she wouldnt, just no she couldn't do that to him._

Without thinking, Kylo stood and basically ran his way towards the room, part of him terrified to see who would be behind that door.

As he entered the room, he felt annoyance rise within him as his eyes met those of that smug bastard.

"Hey buddy, miss me? We have to stop meeting like this you know" The voice of the man was smug, confident even.

And that just angered him more, what the hell had Rey thought bringing this stupid pilot along with her. The more He glared, the wider Poe's smile grew, a laugh soon escaping him.

 **So what do you think?**

 **Poe, seems like a weird choice for Rey to bring along with her doesnt it? but dont worry theres a reason they brought him. And next chapter will be filled with Rey and Kylo angst and goodness.**

 **See yall next time, dont forget to review!**


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